Day 15 – I Am Grateful That I Am Loved
No matter how cranky we’ve been or how badly we’ve screwed up, there are people in our lives that love us. Those people can see past our BS and truly love us just as we are. And thank goodness for them – cuz some days we just can’t muster it up for ourselves.
You know how you feel when you fall in love? Nothing bothers you, you seem to have boundless energy and you feel great about yourself. Imagine how easy it would be go to the gym everyday and eat really well and all the while having fun doing it if we felt “in love” all the time. Do we trust that we deserve to feel that good every day?
How can we possibly take care of and love ourselves if we don’t even feel we deserve it? How can we hit the gym with a spring in our step and love eating that salad if we feel it’s simply what we have to do in order to feel loved or accepted? That’s no fun. It’s sad and defeating and miserable and powerless.
Writing the book brought up all these nasty feelings for me, it was months of pressure and stress and lack of sleep and I found many of my old, bad thoughts creeping in. Lucky for me I live with someone who loves and supports me….but for all the kind words he said, I wasn’t having any of it! Joe would shower me with accolades and lots of love. He’d try to soothe my worried mind but no matter what he said I’d retort “yeah, but…” I really just couldn’t let it in.
On those days when you feel “not worth it” turn to the people in your life that know you are. Look to the husband, best friend, sister, parent or whoever that knows just how much you deserve to feel great about yourself. The next step is the tough one – let it in. When they start going on and on about how beautiful and wonderful you are – believe them! Let it in. And remember you are so lucky to have someone in your life to pick you up after you’ve kicked your own butt.
We are so hard on ourselves and the conversation in our heads is not something we utter out loud – and it’s not usually something we’d dare say about anyone else. So knock it off and hear the words of someone who loves you in your head instead.
I recently had the pleasure of working with Lori – a beautiful, fit, hard working, successful woman getting ready to marry a wonderful man. She was understandably stressed and crazed as she was working full time, planning a wedding and trying to be in top shape – and like any of us would, she was beating herself up because she needed to look “just a little better” before the big day. Who can relate to that? I certainly can.
She was putting such pressure on herself to do it all – and of course do it perfectly – that she often found herself not being so loving to herself. It’s so easy for us to slip into that place, isn’t it?
So fall in love you with you and remember how good being in love feels. Even if there’s no one else around, you can still have that feeling. Learn to love yourself a little more each day and on the days when you can’t muster it, get some love from someone who can see how great you are.
When you start being mean to yourself in your own head, think how those that love you would speak to you and change the conversation. Try to see yourself as they do…I hope Lori always sees herself just as he does in this picture.